Below Deck Mediterranean | Season 5 Episode 12: There’s No Place Like Home
Picking up right where we left off, Sandy confronts Hannah about her drug possession: a prescription for Valium and a pot pen.
Sandy shows her the incriminating picture and asks Hannah to bring the drugs to her. Hannah tells Sandy she hasn’t taken Valium since she’s been on board, but we are shown footage of Hannah very clearly picking up the Valium package and going into her bathroom (sneaky editors!).
Hannah goes back to her cabin and Sandy follows her “to make sure it’s not being destroyed”; Sandy takes the drugs. Back in Sandy’s office, Hannah asks her what she should do. Sandy tells her with everything going on, she can’t go to sea with Hannah, and she’s going to finish the season [without Hannah]. Sandy says she doesn’t want to take any risks with her reputation and the law; Hannah asks for her Valium back, thanks Sandy and tells her she’ll go pack her things.
Sandy explains that due to maritime law, there’s no tolerance for this type of behavior, and what Hannah has done is illegal. If something were to happen, Sandy could be arrested, the boat incarcerated, and she could lose her license. Malia later echoes this, saying “it’s maritime law,” and they have to protect themselves from potential lawsuits if anything were to happen and Hannah wasn’t able to fulfill her duty as chief stew (or fails a drug test). #Understandable, but the situation is still a little gross, all around.
Hannah goes out to the dock and calls her boyfriend; Sandy goes out to talk to her. She says her hands are tied, legally, and she doesn’t want to go out to sea with Hannah the way she’s been – referring to Hannah’s anxiety attacks. Hannah says that’s bull****, and when Sandy tells her she cares about Hannah, Hannah doesn’t believe her. Sandy tells her she could have fired her years ago, and gets very annoyed that Hannah thinks she doesn’t care about her. She tells Hannah “Now, officially, I don’t f****** care” and tells her to pack her things and get off the boat.
In a confessional, Hannah calls Malia a snake for reporting her; when she tells Jess what happened, she says the industry is ‘dog-eat-dog’. Hannah packs her stuff and bumps into Bugsy and Malia; she tells Bugsy what happened, and says “apparently you can get fired for having anxiety attacks.” Hannah tells Malia what Sandy told her; Malia asks if her drugs were registered with the boat and Hannah tells her she doesn’t remember.
Hannah says her goodbyes, 2 hours before the next charter is to begin, and leaves the boat. “This is how it ends?!” she asks as she sits on the dock, smoking a cigarette. She says she’s very aware of maritime laws, and she should have registered the drugs; ultimately it was just a mistake on her part. We see a montage of Hannah’s time on the show – the good, bad and ugly. She says she’s sad to be leaving yachting, but the next chapter will be so much better. Thank you for your service, Hannah! It’s been a wild ride.
The crew says they can’t lose anyone else – 2nd stew, chef, and now chief stew – it has to be a new record! Sandy asks Bugsy to take over as chief stew, and Bugsy agrees. Bugsy says she’ll do whatever she can to carry on; she scrambles to come up with a game plan. She is very hands on with Jess; she shows her how to make drinks and makes lots of lists for her. Bugsy says too many times chief stews expect their stewardesses to just know how to do things. I think given the resources, Bugsy will be an excellent chief stew; it’s been clear for a while Hannah’s heart wasn’t really in it anymore…
Sandy and Malia say they’ll probably see a change in everyone after this incident, and Malia explains she had to get special permission to take Benedryl for an allergic reaction, let alone a controlled substance. Sandy says an entire boat was seized because one weed joint (!) was found. Maritime law is serious! Sandy has a meeting with the crew and explains what’s been going on. The guests finally arrive and the charter gets underway!
Tom gives his lunch menu to Bugsy and they seem to quickly work well together. The deck crew pitches in with running food; the guests seem happy… but Jess lets it slip that Tom is new, and the guests ask Sandy if she’s eaten his food yet. They complain about being served veal, but ultimately praise his food – disaster averted! The guests do ALL the water sports at once, seemingly stressing out Malia; one jet ski tips over but it’s all good.
The guests tell Bugsy they want to do a birthday party that night, off from their original schedule. Tom rolls with this, but gets annoyed at having to make a last minute cake; he complains to Malia in their cabin. Tom has a few issues with food prep and oysters; he continues to be flustered in a very British sort of way, but carries on.
At dinner, the guests mention the oysters all have grit and shells in them. Bugsy tells Tom about the shells, but the guests just want to move on to the next course. It’s lobster, which the guests say is raw; Bugsy brings them back to Tom, who pan fries the pieces of lobster, but gets angry and says he has “too much self respect for this.” Seems like Tom is off to a rough start, but just needs to find his groove. We’ll see how it goes!
After the episode, a trailer for the rest of the season was shown that includes:
Sandy telling the crew that insubordination won’t be tolerated, Johnny Damon is back, belly dancers, jellyfish, Ibiza, trouble in paradise for Rob and Jess, Tom saying he’s ‘done’, difficult docking, Malia chastising Rob, Sandy telling Malia to stay out of the galley, Sandy yelling at Tom, and Tom getting very angry. #RoughWatersAhead
- Sandy calls her headhunter Norma, again, and tells her she need another second stew! The Wellington is single-handedly keeping Norma in business.
- Rob says his relationship with Jess has only gotten stronger and he’s considering going to Bali with her after the charter season.
- There’s a sex toy that somehow makes the rounds around the guest cabins – the less said about that the better, I think. But Alex did get a kick out of it.
- [Spoiler Alert] It’s a Below Deck Med mashup, as the new second stew is reportedly Aesha, from last season! Here’s hoping she, Bugsy and Jess are able to work together with no drama… M